THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Randomize
