Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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