this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
We had sex on a dog bed..
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
