He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Randomize
