Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
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