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• (703): View more from Virginia

  It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...

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• (716): View more from New York

  I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?

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• (360): View more from Washington

  Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

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• (408): View more from California

  we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.

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• (253): View more from Washington

  Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night

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• (305): View more from Florida

  I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.

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  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

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• (336): View more from North Carolina

  Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM

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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors

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• (937): View more from Ohio

  Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.

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• (562): View more from California

  Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?

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• (816): View more from Missouri

  I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?

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