hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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