It's like God shit irony all over that family
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Randomize
