just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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