Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize