I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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