don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
