is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
That accounts for only three of the penises
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
