would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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