like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
