I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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