i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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