VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Randomize
