she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
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