My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
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