so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Randomize
