tell your sister to shave her snatch
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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