Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
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