Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize