bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
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