Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
