nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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