Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Randomize
