im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
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