Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Randomize