My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize
