i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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