if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
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