if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
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