She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
you win again, gameday.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Randomize
