We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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