But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
