the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
So many bounce houses so little time
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
