but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
