There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize