Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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