I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
only if we run a train.
done.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Randomize
