Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
jump out the window naked night went bad
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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