she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Randomize
