in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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