Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
