do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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