From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
