You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She even gives head with a lisp.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
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