If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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