dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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