entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Randomize
