yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize